loveitorlopit

So.  I have a big decision to make.  Do I just love my saggy skin, or lop it off?  I fluctuate on whole idea of plastic surgery.  Of course I would love to have a nice nip and tuck, but when you are left with excess skin from massive weightloss the surgery options are anything but a simple nip and tuck.

I went for a referral with an excellent plastic surgeon here in victoria who specialized in post weight loss patients.  Not alot of doctors apparently want to deal with us on the basis that the 'end' result isn't always the prettiest, and if we choose to go for what MSP pays for they don't get that much money for thier time and effort.

So here are my options.  A full body lift (to the tune of $17k) YIKES.  Not really an option financially for me right now unless I remortgage my house, and I don't think I want a new ass THAT much.  A fleur de lis tummy tuck where the make a vertical and horizontal cut and pull everything together and up, but just in the front.  The scarring is quite extensive and the cost of that would be about $8K.  Then there is a good old Panniculectomy where they just cut off the excess skin in the belly area and sew you up.  This one is paid for by MSP insurance, but it doesn't do anything for loose muscles or shaping.

I've thought about standing on a street corner and asking the first 17,000 people I see for a loonie donation, but I'd have to give up my full-time job to do that, and pay for a baby-sitter....so a bit counter productive...LOL.  On top of that, there is the massive incision around the whole circumference of my body, the risks, the healing process, the pain, and time time I'd need to recover.  However, the end result would give me the figure I've been dreaming of my whole life.  The Fleur de lis, would help shape my torso a bit better, and pull a bit of my ass up, but the vertical incision meeting a horizontal incision never heals well being the furthest from a blood supply.  The Panni, would be the easiest to heal from and would flatten my stomach a bit....maybe get rid of that lovely 'slapping' sound when I run....(Really I do have to laugh at these things....LOL)...and i always have the option to do more at a later time.  Like when publishers clearing house dumps a cheque off on my doorstep one day.....

Ah, the delights of post-weight loss surgery.  And believe it or not, just having the option is delight enough.  There are days when my saggy ass, thighs, and belly skin drive me nuts, but I am definitely more happy and healthy at my current weight of 155lbs.  I was more comfortable in a bathing suit at 267lbs than I am now. But if this is the body I choose to have for the rest of my life, it will serve me well enough.  I will love it regardless of what I choose or choose not to lop off....

Hmmm.....did I say street corner????  Yikes.

thefirstsurgiversary

My god, it's been October since I've posted anything.  Hard to believe that time flies by so quickly and ya get busy with life, and four months has gone by.....

I thought I'd post a little one year surgiversary update, for any of you folks who have been checking in from time to time and might be curious.

I'm below my original goal weight of 160.  Last time I stepped on the scales I was 151.  I feel great! 

However there have been struggles.  Maintaining is a daily challenge, and I'm still chasing the num num dragon.  Everyday I have to be aware of what I choose to eat and how that will affect me.  This surgery wasn't a miracle cure from hunger and food issues.  I still get hungry every 2 hours.  I have ALOT of excess skin (oh great!), and I'll probably never be able to afford the plastic surgery I'll need to have to remove it.  It ain't going away without a knife...no matter how much I lose.  Then again...it is sometimes fun to play with in the bath.... (now I'm just kidding...stop being grossed out!)

That being said, I do feel more powerful than the food that consumed me.  I'm sure it could still eat me up if I let it, so remembering everyday that I've been given a real gift by having this surgery is important for me to keep in mind.  I have muscles that I can see, and the yoga and pilates I've been doing have really strengthened my core.  Funny enough, I don't float as well in the water, so I have to put alot more effort into swimming.  The chronic pain in my back is also GONE.  It's gone. I know my poor old spine is still fused in spots, and the squish is gone out of a few disks, but the daily pain in my ass is GONE! 

It's so exciting to move through life in a less cumbersome package, and it feels so amazing to be able try new things! Best of all, I'm starting to recognize the girl in the mirror as me.

thegoal

Goal weight reached..probably yesterday, and I missed it.  I actually am 1 lbs less than my goal weight.  So I'm setting a new one.  150lbs.  That will take my BMI below that magical number of 25.  I don't want to be unrealistic about how much more I should or should not lose, I think my body will know. Maybe I'll get there, and maybe I will stall at 155...who knows?  I'm delighted with where I am right now....today!  If I can maintain my new size 8 ass it will be like xmas everyday.

running

So.....I started running.  And you know what?  I'm really liking it. 

I have childhood memories of running.  They were torturous!  Remember the 'lap-a-thons' at school, and the dreaded 'Participaction Fitness Challenge'?  I sucked at them.  I usually got 5 laps in to the lap-a-thon and took a stitch in my side enough to split me in two, and sat the rest out on the school gym bench.  Although, with that track record (no pun intended), I never had a problem getting sponsors. I also never raised much money for whatever cause we were supposed to be running for either...LOL

So, while on vacation I decided to visit our hotel's gym.  No one there except me, so I jumped on the treadmill and started running...just to see how far I could go.  And I got to 1 and had enough.  Then I thought, hey I'm in the states, this thing is rigged in miles not kilometers.  I just ran 1.6 km without stopping!  Cool!

I did it for the next 2 days of my vacation, and now that I'm home I'm setting a goal for myself to run the 8k road race in the Victoria Marathon on 10-10-10.  Who knows if  I'll have the endurance to go the whole distance running, but I'm going to do my best.  I'm up to 3.5 km so far.  I'll keep ya posted on my progress.

dadadadaaaaa

CENTURY CLUB REACHED TODAY!  YAY  ME!

9togoal

Just a little update on my progress.  Only 9 lbs left to get to my goal of 160.  The first picture was taken just after my surgery (Feb 2010) and the other was (Aug 2010)

thingsthatmakemefeelskookum

Jese I feel freakin good.  Life is completely different.  I took the kiddies to Cultus Lake Water Park this past week, and revelled in the freedom that losing almost 100lbs has given me.  Not only was it awesome to climb up 10 flights of stairs without breaking a sweat, but to do it while carrying a two year old and a double inner tube is pretty skookum! 

Other things that make life more "skookum"

 - fitting my ass into a size 10 jeans
 - not having the seatbelt in my truck choke the living daylights out of me
 - wearing anything with a size small on the tag
 - touching my chin to my knees without needing surgery to replace broken body parts
 - running without giving myself a concussion
 - fitting my ass into a size 10 jeans
 - finding my hip bones
 - needing my rings resized
 - trading in my double chin for a turkey neck
 - doing a kart wheel on the front lawn with MacKenna
 - fitting my ass into a size 10 jeans
 - riding my bike without impaling my ass on the seat
 - sleeping double in a single bed
 - and fitting my ass into a size 10 jeans

Only 11 lbs to goal, and 4 lbs until I join the century club.